oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
