how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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