she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
