Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
