And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
