Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize