Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
