is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize