its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize