Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
