I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
