go do what you do best...puke behind churches
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
