He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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