Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
God, I missed his penis.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
