What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
