Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize