I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
