Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Randomize
