That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize