Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
