You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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