Non-Jews are for practice
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize