I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
