I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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