By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I could fuck to npr.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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