you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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