Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
