Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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