Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
