i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
