make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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