Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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