I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
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