Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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