Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
