Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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