Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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