think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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