I heard we made out
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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