Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
