how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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