Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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