Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
