So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
