Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
