omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
