then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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