dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
