Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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