there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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