Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
